10 RULES FOR KNOWING WHEN TO CHANGE A ROLL OF TOILET PAPER
1. There is not so much as a speck of lint left on the cardboard roll
2. You actually contemplate using the cardboard roll.
3. You consider calling 911 from your cell phone but don’t know how you
would let them in the front door.
4. You find yourself wondering just how scratchy a page of paper from the newspaper you are reading would be.
5. You also find yourself wondering if the ink from the newspaper you are
reading would run off and tattoo your butt with today’s headlines.
6. You recall that there is another roll in the linen closet and wonder if anyone will see you making a mad dash out there with your pants down.
7. You wonder how long one actually has to drip, to “drip dry.”
8. You beg your toddler to slide a napkin under the door.
9. He gives you his blankie instead.
10. You actually consider using his blankie.
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